NOTHING IS MORE SEXY

THAN GIVING A SHIT.

by True Skalde

 

You were not put on this planet A. to absolutely fucking destroy it and B. to be a BooHoo NastyGal prettylittlething wearing gal named Zara. You weren’t, babe. Wearing Forever 21 is basically the same thing as draping a flaming hot CO2 emitting white flag of creative defeat over your back. You have so much more substance to you and what you put on your body must reflect that. Fast fashion has been on the hot plate for time now (thank god) but with recent trends such as metal and straws and mesh bags, which we love, backed by all those 'very original' instagram 'influencers' I think the momentum is heading somewhere. The fashion industry causes the second most pollution on Earth next to the oil industry. Now is the not the time for ignorance. Wake up, give a fuck.


Real quick though, to every Instagram influencer: Fuck you and your use “Alexis15” for 15% off your first order of bullshit. You're unoriginal, boring, and supporting child slavery, unsafe workplace conditions, the exploitation of animals and people, and killing our home one ugly viscose off the shoulder top at a time. The use of using social media for evil and the whole entire job position of “influencer” is honestly idiotic and even trying to speak negatively about the impact feels like shouting into a big gaping void. So I'm not talking to you Alexis, fuck you. You're living a discounted life. I'm talking to genuine people who are really going to make a difference and who give a fuck.


There is no sexier feeling then being at a function in a dress that no one else has ever seen and that fits you like the pattern was taken from your measurements. Okay... there is maybe one greater feeling:  someone complimenting said dress and you replying back with “It's vintage” followed by that subtle smirk of victory, knowing you are the dopest, sickest, sexiest lady at that function. You are also above all else superior because you believe in reducing and reusing, baby. Wearing a  one of a kind item that you found and curated into your closet (for *most times* a fraction of the price)...there's no better feeling. Buying used clothing is the textbook scenario of a win/ win. You look impossibly interesting while at the same time you're not buying into commercialism bullshit and destroying the planet. In a world with a 278.2 billion dollar fashion industry, instead of shopping at the same damn place- challenge yourself to be a trailblazer. Challenge yourself to think about what you put on your body, how it makes you feel, and how it effects the whole entire world.


The fashion industry is a big steaming pile of fuck, honestly like most of the world. However that whole thing about how  one snowflake can cause an avalanche is somewhat comforting. Everything you could ever want has already been made.
 

Read that again.


You just gotta get out there and find it baby. That Leopard Dior Saddle bag you absolutely can not live without (trust me, I get it) is currently available at What Goes Around Comes Around, Treasures of New York, and fucking eBay. Know the best part of your need? Its dead-stock so basically you couldn't even get Christian to rise from the dead and make you a brand knew mint condition one no matter how much conjuring you do. Win/Win because nothing new has been emitted into the universe and you got your bag. You go girl.


So now we're moving into the psychologically based explanation; getting to the deepest rooted fears of why you are so scared and apprehensive to buying pre-loved. Here are some common excuses I've (yes, actually) heard from family, friends, and people on the street who are absolutely disgusted after they ask where i got my “sick t-shirt” and I reply with the staggering low price of 4.95 at Value Village.

 

“True that's literally disgusting, you have no idea who had that before you." In my mind I'm like literally that so dope, could of been Madonna, could of been a serial killer. The intrigue.
 

“Its overwhelming.” I promise you it is never more overwhelming than fast fashion retailers during sale season. Its never more overwhelming, or frustrating, than that.
 

“I just don't have enough time to sift through and find stuff.” This is my favorite because it literally makes the least sense. If you have time to sift through not only the racks but the fucking floor of Zara’s 9 circles of hell then I promise you, you have the time.
 

“Things just don't fit me right” This is just simply untrue because there is no way that disgusting ribbed polyester H&M dress is really hitting all the right spots on your body...its just not. Also there is nothing a good tailor cant do.
 

“I don’t have a good eye.” I think the issue with this excuse is not the fact that you are not *actually* using your two blessed eyeballs, rather it may be the fact you have no sense of personal style or identity but instead have been relying on what fast- fashion has been selling you and therefore have no idea what you should even be looking for.
 

Now of course with everything in life there are levels to this. We have beginners who should probably start with a more curated experience. If you live in any town that has even a minuscule shopping available, there will probably be somewhat of a vintage store around. Believe it or not this whole buying used is not new. Collectibles and rare items have been sought after for centuries. Theres a lot of beauty in something that is from a time that isn't this shitstorm we call the present. There are vintage store gems hidden all across the world. A lil' 10 minute internet worm hole using the city you're in and the world “vintage” and you're bound to find some gold mines. Just a reminder that vintage is an emotional roller coaster. You might find the most perfect fitting levis you have ever put on your body or you might find racks and racks of cat themed sweaters and shirts. Either way: great story.
 

As a side note to anyone interested in giving a fuck, getting out in the real world of thrift and vintage is scary. Thrift stores more times than not are just big warehouses with racks and racks and racks of shit. Some amazing shit and some shit shit. If you need to settle your way in a little bit slower start with online. There are a million and one ways to get started with buying pre-loved online. Also for the newest of the beginners: Depop, baby. Huge fan. Depop is an app that allows you to buy or sell anything from luxury fashion to sneakers to the perfect slip dress of your dreams. Its almost like a replica of instagram where you can follow shops and sellers you like and theres even an explore page that Depop has catered to your algorithm to show you things that you didn't even know you needed. You can message directly with sellers and its all protected through Paypal. For a level up, eBay baby. Not going to lie, until recently, I was an eBay newbie. The whole thing used to give me crags list, scummy, scammy vibes. However, eBay is the perfect website to type in exactly what you're looking for and have 100 pages of options come up. Dior Saddle Bag? 572 results. Vintage 501 Levis? 7,137 results. eBay also stands by their “eBay money back guarantee," meaning for if your item is not looking as cute as in the picture. Yet again: another Win/Win.

 

Meeting a new love interest and immediately scrolling back 134 weeks and finding out which females are cousins and which ones we must keeps tabs on...that seems to be  information we must find out immediately. So why are you not that crazy about what the back story of the clothing is that you put on your body? When buying pre-loved is not an option you better know exactly what you are supporting and sporting on your body. You must care about yourself and the world around you enough to take an extra 5 minutes and do a little research on whatever brand you are about to give your hard earned boss lady money to and if you want to be someone who supports the morals and ideals of this brand. 21 Billion pounds of textile waste end up in landfills every year.

 

Making educated purchases is imperative and critical. Educated purchases apply to vintage as well. Over consuming on recycled products does nothing to the cycle if in a few months you end up donating it back to where you got it from. Be smart and curated about what you bring into your life. Is it sustainable? What are the actual contents of their clothing? Where is the clothing manufactured? To they have any certifications of being fair trade or organic? Do they support charities? Are they an independent artist, designed and owned from within? Important questions like these that literally take a few clicks or scrolls to find answers are imperative to being a thoughtful shopper.
 

Vintage clothing does have the intrigue of eccentric vibes to accompany it. Obviously, its not from this time. I think another misconception about vintage is you have to be this electric rock n' roll gypsy princess. False. Yes, It is much easier to find a silk slip dress to throw on with cowboy boots and call it a day. So to all my professional, tailored babes: You do not get a free pass to own the same ugly Club Monaco blouse in 13 colors. Club Monaco, by the way, comes in at a disgusting C- on our 2019 Ethical Fashion Report. Finding used pieces takes practice, persistence, and an open mind. You can have a completely professional wardrobe of perfectly curated pre-loved pieces but its just about taking the time to find the exact look you want. That perfect power suit is out there, its just waiting for you to find it. Another bonus of buying pre-loved is that that silk blouse has been on a journey. The label may say dry clean only but chances are that previous owner or owners

may have not paid that much attention to detail. This blouse has stood the test of time and washing machines and is now waiting to rock your world. Vintage and thrifted items are made with a higher level of quality and have been around the block so I promise you it will last longer than that repulsive “dry clean only” 7% cotton 93% polyester button down.


Now there are some things you simply just can not buy used. Underwear and socks. You literally could not even purchase that at a vintage store if you wanted to (or maybe you could?). By all means you can seek out used underwear for sale but thats just a different vibe than I'm focusing on. When buying new clothing items the absolute bottom of the barrel least you can do is make sure that it is sustainable and ethically made. Baptist World Aid Australia comes out with an Ethical Fashion Report each year where they round up 130 global brands and give them a rating for A-F based on policies, trace-ability, transparency, auditing, supplier relationship, environmental management, and worker empowerment. Hanes is rated at a solid A in the 2019 Report. However stay far, far away from Fruit of the Loom because those motherfuckers are rated at a “D+”. My absolute one stop shop organic cotton clothing shop is Pact. Pact submits to The Global Organic Textile Standard (GOTS) which is truly amazing and honestly really hard to achieve. Pact utilizes organic cotton which is A. amazing for your body and B. the wash phase of the creation process utilizes 95% less water than conventional cotton so you never have to worry about harsh chemicals, bleaches or dyes. To look even deeper into that since the cotton pact uses is GOTS certified, during production process you don't have to worry about worker abuse or pesticide usage. Hell yeah!


In world full of discount clothes, codes, and honestly people I find vintage and thrifted clothing therapeutic and like a wave of relief. There is nothing special about that Urban Outfitters dress that you and 12 of your other girlfriends have. Is it worth wearing a piece of clothing made out of garment workers blood? Never. The most insane part of buying fast fashion and from big corporate retailers is A. the inspiration is taken from vintage clothing (so why not just buy the actual vintage piece instead of the remake, knockoff of it?) and B. if its not ripped off from vintage its ripped of from independent designers. There are zero benefits of shopping fast-fashion. Fast-fashion clothing ends up being more expensive because the longevity of the wear of it is astronomically shorter time span than that of a well crafted vintage piece that has stood the test of time or that of a a thoughtfully crafted piece made with care in a safe work environment from earth friendly products. Above all else fast-fashion fills this void of trying to keep up with the times. Remaining cute. Remaining trendy. I promise you wearing one of a kind pieces that you've found and curated into your closet will leave you feeling so much sexier and so much happier with your choices of clothing and how you're impacting the world. There is so much beauty and respect in caring...in wanting to leave a positive impact...in being a good influence. When you chose to thrift and buy pre-loved you are doing all those things while looking cool as fuck. Looking into a closet full of pieces that have history, have a story, and have meaning to you is so much more interesting and fulfilling than looking into a closet full of dangling, droopy viscose and polyester sad sacks. Even with the lightest of research into the fashion industry, you will find disgusting stories of worker conditions, exploitation of women, direct chronic and life long illness from chemicals and millions of horrific facts from all over the world. Orsola de Castro says “[Clothes] are our chosen skin.” Our clothes are an extension of who we are, It’s an outlet of communication. What does your skin reflect? You are so beautiful and have the power to create our future with your everyday choices. Pre-loved is one of the easier choices of what our brothers and sisters and our world needs of us. Breaking free from the fast-fashion cycle leaves a lot of room for guilt. Use this guilt as passion and motivation to demand social change. This is too important to have a single blind eye turned on it. Use your privilege and guilt as a catalyst in your life and the lives of your loved ones. Be different. Be an inspiration to yourself and whoever comes into your path. Fuck the status quo. You can do it babe. Even you Alexis.